Looking Ahead
by LilyGhost
Summary: Stephanie realizes there's always room to grow ... both in life and in her relationship with Ranger.


**Everybody and everything familiar still belongs to Janet. The mistakes are mine alone.**

"You're going to have to let me in sometime, Steph."

"Ummm, you can pick my locks in your sleep and you just let yourself in five minutes ago."

I can tell he wanted to sigh. I know all the signs since I sigh _a lot_ , usually when someone's in the middle of asking where Ranger and I are 'headed'. I like where we are now, and he hasn't complained about being with me, so why do we have to discuss _the future_ when we're enjoying _our now_?

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. I'd never want or expect you to fall to your knees and thank me for entering your life ..."

He stopped talking when he saw my expression, then he gave me a killer grin that had me worried about my panties flooding.

"Believe me, Babe, if you were on your knees, I'd be thinking of you doing something else to me besides saying thank you. That being said ... I wouldn't be opposed to hearing you say you love me without being prompted."

"You know I love you. I have to listen to Eddie say how gross I am for how much I actually do."

"This is exactly what I mean. You can say it, but only after I do."

"Can I ask you a question and then get back to that observation?"

"Is your question 'what are we having for dinner'?"

"No. This is a you/me question."

He put a hand flat against the counter near Rex's cage as he studied me, causing my furry little man to look questioningly up at my way-too-sexy one.

"What would you like to know?" He asked.

"How are you so much better than me at saying what you mean and how you feel? You're a big, tough, Special Forces guy, a man who makes skips crap themselves just hearing your name. You can even make someone like Tank look alarmed when you're pissed. How can telling me _'I love you_ ' be easy?"

"Who says it is?" He asked me, reaching out to tuck the curl I've been trying to control all day, back behind my ear.

I tipped my head to the side, which immediately dislodged it again. That is one of my own observations. He always seems to be touching me whenever he gives away a little more of himself.

"Well ... I _thought_ it was painless. Maybe it's not and you just make it look that way," I told him.

"Expressing my love for someone isn't any easier for me than it is for you, but some people have you more worried about losing them, than getting hurt yourself."

"You've been worried about losing me?"

"Many times and for many different reasons."

"Despite what it looked like, I never would've survived Morelli. Why do you think I didn't mind you testing my boundaries every chance you got? He was just an illness that invaded my system. It took a lot of recovery time, but I finally got myself healthy. Once my head and my mouth started working together at the same time ... he was toast. Though I should've ground him into breadcrumbs decades ago."

"He was only a two-bit player in this. If I ever felt you were becoming serious about him or felt threatened by him as I was wrapping up my old life, he would've been on a permanent 'undercover job'."

"Can you arrange one of those now?"

"Whenever you give the word," he told me.

"Not that I want him to disappear from the face of the earth or anything."

"You do."

"Okay, I _really_ do, but I don't want you and the guys questioned if he goes MIA, so let's just continue to forget he exists and focus on us. Are you afraid I don't love you?"

One of his hands curled tightly around mine. Again with the touching ... so I know he's about to say something important.

"I know you do. I have to untangle myself from all four of your limbs every morning, even though you claim your affection isn't always physically shown."

"For such a hard body, it _is_ surprisingly comfortable ... and really, really warm."

I got a brief but still tingly kiss for that before he continued. "There are few people I trust to protect me. You and Tank are tied for the top spot."

"Tank has exceptional taste in friends. He wouldn't want to lose his best one."

"He likes you, too."

I snorted. " _Sure_ he does."

"He does, Steph. Which should have you feeling better about yourself ... and us. He's an extremely guarded man ... one who doesn't let himself get close to many people. And he's accepted you."

"Yeah, because of _you_. He, along with all the guys, would do anything for you including liking me."

"There's a hole in your theory. My men seek you out even when they aren't on-duty. I can order them to follow you twenty-four-seven, but I haven't yet."

"Yeah, because you decided to handle my off-duty hours personally. Anyway, we're talking about you, not me. I'm not as good as you at saying what I mean as often as I should, but I do love you wholeheartedly."

"So you won't find a fault with moving in with me for more than a week or two at a time?"

"If you really want to live with me ... I won't question it. Not only would I die to protect you, I'll do what I swore I wouldn't ever do again ... cohabitate with a guy other than Rex. I'll even raise the stakes and admit that I'd consider marrying you and having your baby ... _eventually_. Is that an okay reply to your 'let me in' comment?"

"You always satisfy any need I could have. This is no different."

"So we're good?"

"We've always been good, it just took you longer to see it."

"I have seen it, I was just worried it'd wear off on your end," I admitted.

His fingers disappeared into my hair and as they flexed against my scalp, I had to stop myself from actually purring.

"Has it?"

" _Nooooo_ ," I answered.

That sounded a tad moany, but it wasn't totally feline in nature so I congratulated myself for having _some_ self-control.

"When do you see us doing this?" He asked me.

I shifted my head again and studied the sexy angles of his face. Ranger was aggressive in pursuing me, and while I'll say he's been the compass steadily guiding my crazy ... he's never once pushed me for more than I can give at the time. From the second I told him that Morelli is now a footnote in my life and just a fungus in my mind, Ranger showed up at my apartment every morning he could with coffee, a small smile, and two Boston Cream doughnuts. He knows the road to my heart takes a detour through my stomach, so he also asked me to have dinner with him on nights I wasn't going out after someone. Even then, he 'happened' to appear wherever I was and we'd have a bite to eat once the unlucky scumbag was back in the system.

Mary Lou was supportive, but still apprehensive about me getting involved with Jersey's Batman so soon after I told Morelli to take a hike. I was a little concerned about being in a relationship, too, but not for the same reasons. I was more afraid of what I'd be willing to do _for_ Ranger, than what he'd _do to_ me. He's more of a grown-up than I am and a hell of a lot more emotionally-mature than I'll ever be. He's never flip-flopped when it comes to loving and protecting me.

He has an impressive, yet comfy apartment at the top of a building containing a few dozen quiet but incredibly sweet men who respect the hell out of him, a respect that's obviously returned. My Batman is also one of six kids, and it's obvious when you see them all together, that he loves and genuinely likes every one of his siblings ... and his parents even more.

That was, and still is, the biggest difference between us. He appears well-adjusted and content with his life even with what he's had to do during terrifying decades of it. Yet _I'm_ the one who's hesitant and suspicious of just about everyone, especially ones claiming to care about me. After meeting him, it took him a grand total of two days to become somebody I can't live without, yet it took _years_ before I was able to admit that to myself.

"And people have accused _me_ of being the silent one," he told me, when I'd taken too long to respond to what he'd said.

"When do _you_ see me moving into your apartment?" I countered.

He raised an eyebrow at me. He knows exactly what I'm doing.

"Okay ..." I said. "I may have more dude traits than female ones, because I don't have immediate visions of divvied-up closet space and new curtains for the seventh-floor floating around in my head."

"That's one of the reasons why I pursued you relentlessly."

Hah, he just admitted to being a hunter of more than just bounties ... a caring, extremely sexy, and totally irresistible one.

"You're not like anybody I've ever met," he continued.

I laughed at that while I put my hands on his hips, being the one who needs contact now. "The planet should be grateful and very relieved that there's only _one_ of me. A Stephanie Plum-clone would probably end civilization."

He smiled, making his full and addictive lips kick up to one side.

"That's a three-way I'd be _very_ interested in."

I punched him gently in the stomach, not that his twenty-pack felt a friggin' thing.

"It's good to see that your training automatically kicked in," he said to me.

"Manny did say I have balls and that's why I go after everyone else's."

"I've seen, touched, and tasted, your naked body many times, and I've never found a pair on you. I'll have to do another thorough search later to be sure."

"Search away. So ... even if it takes me a couple weeks to get my and Rex's address completely changed, you're okay with that because you know I'm not objecting to the move?"

"Yes," he said. The fact that his lips are twitching, warned me that some Ranger-humor is coming. "I didn't put all this effort into you to give up now."

" _Effort_?" I asked. "What effort? I'm perfect ... you've said so yourself."

"I said you were _perfect for me_."

"Same thing. You're perfect for me, too. Actually, you're perfect _period_. You're an authority figure all the guys look up to and try to emulate. You're kind and considerate to the people who deserve it. And all animals love you. If you didn't have muscles bulging out everywhere, a five o'clock shadow at nine in the morning, and off-the-charts testosterone levels, you'd meet all the qualifications for a stereotypical storybook princess."

"I have _something_ besides muscles and facial hair that takes me completely out of the princess running."

I shivered at the extra gravel he'd added to his voice, and I thought back to last night, agreeing with him one-hundred percent. He's definitely more of a ' _sword_ '-wielder than a midnight ball-dancer.

"And you're way sexier than your run-of-the-mill Prince _something or other_. Now that I'm thinking about it, I was always more fascinated with G.I. Joe than Prince Philip. Even as a little girl, I knew me and Mary Lou's Barbie could do better than the future king of someplace as stifling as the Burg."

"That's another reason why I love you." His body went still as he watched me. "You just did it again."

"Did what?" I asked him.

"Paused when I said I love you. Is it that hard to hear?"

" _Honestly?_ "

"I wouldn't have asked if I wanted a bullshit answer, Steph."

"My family never bought into the whole touchy-feely, hugs-and-kisses, kind of relationship. We say 'Happy Birthday', 'Merry Christmas', and 'Glad you no longer have the flu', but that's the extent of it. We imply that we love each other to other people ... we just never _say_ it."

"Your family is extremely vocal when it comes to telling people off."

" _Exactly!_ " I said.

"Exactly ... _what_?" He asked.

"If I didn't like you," I told him, "you couldn't help but be aware of it. If I didn't love you, I never would've let you come with me to my parents' house on all the major holidays when the Plums are at their worst. I needed you to really see what I come from so you wouldn't be disappointed later on by what you ended up with. Which sorta happened anyway."

His fingers tightened and he tugged my head up to meet his now narrowed eyes. They usually exude a zen-like calm when I'm upset, but they're burning like fire now.

"I am _not_ disappointed with any part of you," he said. "And _you_ are _not_ disappointing me in any way, either. I fell in love with the woman I met that day at the diner who was angry, frustrated, yet still determined to do her job well. My thoughts on, and my respect and love for, her haven't changed. Or maybe they _have_ changed, since they've intensified since we've been together."

"But you did say you wanted me to 'let you in'."

"I'm only saying on occasion I'd be nice to _hear_ as well as feel how much you care."

"I can understand that. In case I haven't said it enough today ..." I told him, "I hope you're ready for it, because here it comes ... I love you, everything about you, and everything you stand for. Not only would I use my last breath to defend you, I hereby give you your pick of my organs if you ever need one and we were a match. If that wasn't enough, I love you so much, I'd want to take care of you all by myself when you got sprung from the hospital after surgery. And I'd actually mean - and try to do - it, too."

" _Stephanie_."

"I'm kidding, but I'm also really serious."

In my opinion, actions _always_ speak louder than words, but maybe I can learn how to combine the two and start giving him back a little of what he's already given me.

"Deal?" I asked.

"You have a deal, Babe. We're sticking together for better or worse ..."

Considering what I'd just said to him, I smiled before going up on tiptoes.

"And in sickness and in health," I agreed against his lips.

We sealed the deal, our commitment to each other, and my promise to take the next step with him, with one hell of a kiss.


End file.
